concerning farewells

How do I say good-bye? I mean technically I already have. I am sitting in a hostel in Dublin and have now spent two days away from my Europe Semester family. I see everyone’s faces now and again, hear our jokes, remember our memories, and accidentally laugh out loud at them sometimes because they are just too good. I obviously cannot sum up this semester in a blog post but I feel compelled tell you how I feel now that it is all over. If you won’t listen who will right?

First of all, I am blown away by how well the semester went. I mean that sincerely. When I say everyone got along, I truly mean it. I do not believe I was in a dream-like state where in reality, everyone tolerated one another, but we had extreme cliques and dislikes. Obviously we had friends we were closer to, but dinner groups constantly got switched around as did the roommates; we were all comfortable with each member of the group despite our different personalities and backgrounds. Is that dropping heavily enough for you? 43 young people all getting along. Praise the Lord. Each week, each new city, I kept expecting drama to creep up on us. I thought, “surely, this is the week the honeymoon period will end and groups will start to form and people will be shut out etc etc.” That day never came. I am not sure if we ever had a ‘honeymoon period’, it was hard from day one, but it was always good. So so good.

Second, Vespers was one of the most memorable and shaping events of our semester. Every Sunday night we would meet together in our hotel/ hostel lounge/room, wherever we could find, and worship. We would sing, share, pray for one another, take Communion, and end with more singing. The sharing is what was so striking to me. Since our very first Vespers in Oxford, our group opened up their hearts and shared more than anyone expected. The level of vulnerability within our group was entirely a gift from the Lord. We were all deeply invited into each other’s struggles, pains, and joys. These are the nights we all the looked forward to and I would say these nights were the main reason we stayed the way we did. Without inviting the Spirit into our group at least once a week, I am convinced this trip would not have been even a fraction of as incredible as it was.

And lastly, I say it’s all over, but it is not over.

I cannot wait for spring semester to start when I will see everyone again and relive every good and bad moment we had on this trip. Hell, I can’t wait to get home during Christmas break and text them (never thought I’d look forward to texting so much). I really am firm in believing that Europe Semester was just a basis for these friendships, it did not encompass them. And sometimes I get anxious with the fear that people will not pursue each other, that there will be a few of us always striving to keep these friendships alive and we will eventually give up in exhaustion from trying.

But perfect love casts out all fear. The Lord has his hand over all of our relationships. He greatly desires our fellowship with one another. His perfect love saves us. Our group was not by any means perfect nor did we love perfectly, but when I remember how well we did love each other, and how much we love each other still, the fear ceases.