it was well worth it

I just spent the past week as a leader with Santa Barbara for our week at Woodleaf.  I wanted to share with ya'll all the was the experience for me..

It started out so so hard.  Leaving the intern community was so difficult for me.  To be honest I was ready to get out of the house (and I still am for the sole reason that I cannot stand how messy it is).  But I was not ready to leave the support system of my friends here.  My two closest friends are in the kitchen so I didn't see them around camp with my girls.

I could not believe that my one girl I brought was coming.  It shocked me even when she stepped off the bus.  But those first couple hours were rough, she wasn't quite sure why she was here and I was doubting how she would even receive anything from the week.

I did not know why I was doing it.  I had a breakdown before our first meal.  I had no idea what to say to her or how to make her have a good week.  It would have been easier to landscape.

The group of girls in our cabin got along surprising well.  I was also put in a cabin with the two women leaders I get along best with.  They were such a support to me and we really worked as a team to decide what was best for our girls in every problem that arose (and there were plenty i.e. sickness and injury amount many of our girls).

We split our cabin times into two groups and I lead one of them.  Some nights were better than others.  A constant reminder I got throughout that week was that I have control over nothing.  

I could not make these girls share their lives (and sometimes they didn't).

I could not make them understand Jesus.

I could not make them want Him.

I could not make them have fun.

I could only just show up.  And I prayed that the Lord would give me words to speak to these girls.  And He did (of course).

These girls were incredible to me.  Besides my girl, I didn't know most all of them.  One of our girls was from France and none of us knew her before.  Her openness, honesty, and love for fun was a blessing to me.  It was just a joy to share life with those girls.  They let me into their lives and allowed me to love them.  Many of them shared with me things I never imagined they would.  I got to have a few select deep conversations where the Lord spoke through me to these girls.  Spoke of his love (that I do not understand) and of his plan for them.  I just got to talk speak pray to them about God and have them listen.  I grew to love them all so dearly.

(and here we all are)

If that was all that happened then it would have been worth it.  

The one girl I brought ended up not being in my cabin time.  This was in turn such a blessing on so many levels.  I won't be going back to Santa Barbara in the fall so it was so wonderful that she could get to know the other leaders through cabin time.  I was also able to set aside a lot of my pride through that.

And really, along with wonderful, deep, spirit-filled times with all the girls, the most important part best part shocking part life-changing event thing that brought me so much joy is that my girl came to know Jesus this week!!!  Stood up at Say So, soaked in everything that was said and talked about.  I still cannot believe it.

Praise Jesus!  He is so good.

(and if you every have the time/ remember) Please pray for her.  Pray that she would continue in her walk with Jesus.  And pray for the other girls in our cabin- that their lives back home would be full of joy and love, they are so tough.  And that they would continue to know Jesus better and have boldness to follow them.

In His Peace